From the category archives:

Hey Nicole

How Do I Stay Positive?

by Kelly on November 15, 2007

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This is a continuation of the cross blog conversation I’m having with my peep Nicole.

She asks me: What do you do to stay positive? I know your faith is a huge part of your life, and you talked about that a bit in one other question. So, tell me how that helps you in your business.

Nicole, my faith IS my life. I’m not religious and don’t always talk and look like the picture perfect vision of a proper Christian woman - but thank goodness that isn’t what God asks of me.

I stay positive by choice and by necessity.

I used to be terribly negative. Habitually negative! My life stunk so bad from such an early age. So many people let me down again and again that I reached a point in my early twenties where I decided to stop hoping for anything good so that I wouldn’t be disappointed.

I complained all the time because there was always so much to complain about!

But then a friend pointed out to me that complaining doesn’t change anything. In fact, complaining KEEPS you from taking the actions you could be taking because it’s emotionally draining.

Even worse, complaining brings other people down. You know, misery loves company.

My friend told me that I had a choice in how I responded to my life and she challenged me to just keep my mouth shut the next time I felt like complaining and being negative.

And do you know what? I did - and it was painful as all get out! It literally hurt me to swallow down the whining and complaining. I wanted to fuss and bother about things! I wanted to tell my story over and over to whoever would listen - but I didn’t. I just shut my mouth and purposed to place my attention elsewhere.

Over time I was able to ditch the constant negativity and aim my energy at making positive changes so that I would have less to complain about in the future. When I face overwhelming situations today - I don’t complain, I pray. I turn my problems over to God and wait for His direction on next steps.

Well, Nicole, you’re my friend - and you know that I do SOMETIMES lose it and complain about something… but thankfully you’re quick to offer needed comfort and then tell me to Snap Out Of It! LOL!

Now for the second part of your question… how does positivity help my business?

I purpose to be positive and pro-active and this keeps my business growing. I don’t let small failures keep me down. I make decisions based on what I’ve learned from my mistakes.

Author and Speaker John Maxwell calls that Failing Forward and wrote a book by the same name that anyone who struggles with mistakes and failures should read.

Thanks for a GREAT question Nicole!! Now for a good one to shoot back at you…

I ask you: Will you be slowing down for the holiday season as far as the number of hours you put in each week?

I look forward to your next note!

Smooch, Kelly

Blog reader… I feel like I have to add an addendum my note to Nicole and say that choosing to not complain as a habit does not mean that you never go to a friend to vent when you have a problem. The key for me is that I don’t allow myself to vent about the same topic or situation over and over again. When something new comes up or I feel pushed beyond my limits, I DO feel free to spill my guts and ask for support :)

 

So… how do you work at staying positive?

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What do I love on TV?

by Kelly on October 31, 2007

This continues my cross-blog conversation with Nicole Dean.

She asks “What’s your favorite TV show these days? And, what do you do for fun?”

Nicole, I am a total television addict this fall. Ever since I discovered that I can watch my favorite shows on the internet I have been watching three or four shows a day on the mac on my desk while I work.

I like watching/listening to shows while I do graphics especially since that is about shapes and colors and design more than about words and thoughts. It helps me to relax and not think about all of the ‘other work’ I might think about.

I’m watching:

  • Dancing with the Stars (rooting for Marie Osmond!)
  • Private Practice
  • Grey’s Anatomy
  • Pushing Daisies
  • Extreme Makeover
  • Brothers and Sisters (Rob Lowe is hot!)
  • Big Shots
  • Heroes
  • Bionic Woman
  • CSI, CSI, CSI
  • Kid Nation
  • Survivor China

Then there are the premium cable series I watch when I don’t feel like working ;) Yes - I watch a ridiculous amount of TV. More than I ever have in the past.

That will probably be changing in a few weeks with the babies come home from the hospital, I’ll have a lot less time for just vegging around and I’m looking forward to it!

What do I do for fun? Shoot - working my business is fun! (I know, I know - you mean non-business fun, right?)

I love to read, I enjoy going out to the movies and having a nice meal. I like to spend time with family and friends. I can really get into a fun game of cards now and then. I like resale shopping and love finding cool deals.

Man I sound like just a girl.

My next question for you… How important do you think a Positive Attitude is to being successful in business? And how have you cultivated a positive outlook for yourself?

How about you reader? Are you positive?

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Where Do I Want To Be In Five Years?

by Kelly on October 21, 2007

This is the next post in my cross blog conversation with Nicole Dean.

And can I just say that she is playing hard ball with this question? Seriously!

She asks me “Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10?

Hey Nicole,

Way to pull out the big time existential crisis generating question in ten words or less!

This next year will be largely devoted to helping my niece and her husband with the quads. I don’t look too far into the coming months for anything other than a lot of bottles and diapers. (And I like it that way!)

Sean will graduate and go to college. I imagine he’ll live at home through college but I don’t know that for sure - who knows what adulthood and his own car will bring?

I see 2009 as the year of breaking free… being free to travel and do all the things I haven’t done up to now whether it was for lack of income or lack of opportunity - I guess you could say I see 2009 as the year of lack of lack. ;)

That only takes me forward a full two years - and beyond that, I really don’t have a clue. I certainly don’t have a well thought out plan.

I want to have the best of both worlds. Time here at home to enjoy my family and time on the road to enjoy my ever growing circle of amazing friends and business partners.

What sort of income will I need to achieve that dream? I realize now that I have to do more financial planning… blech!

Do you that I have never really enjoyed long range planning? I wonder why? I’m sure it has something to do with early disappointments and feeling like I couldn’t depend on anyone or anything. I don’t feel that way anymore - I trust and lean fully on God - but even now I don’t really like to sit down and try to plot things out too far in advance.

It’s not like I feel insecure about the future - I feel really positive about it. My gut instinct is that I’ll get where God wants me to be when He wants me to be there. I trust that He has the master plan all worked out and He’ll give me enough light to see the next step or two.

There - how’s that for existential? Sorry I can’t make the five year forecast - I hope the two year will do!

Now, good for you I’m not cruel - my next question will not require that you dig deep into your guts for an answer. I’m going quite a bit info left field for this one.

I’m thinking about giving up sugar and caffeine for a season - like three months or so - to see how life without these substances effects me and impacts my ability to focus and work.

What are your thoughts on sugar and caffeine? Good, bad or you don’t care?

I look forward to hearing your opinions friend!

Til next time :)

What do you think about sugar and caffeine?

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I Outsource What I Don’t Like To Think About

by Kelly on October 16, 2007

The next installment in my cross blog conversation with Nicole Dean.

Her question for me is:  “Is there ONE task you just HAVE to outsource or it’ll drive you crazy? I’m gonna limit this one, too, because I know you’ll say “email and customer service” so it has to be something else. “

Hey Nicole :)

You know me pretty well gal pal.
Hmmm… I will go with periodic web updating.  I like to create but I do not enjoy maintaining things.   I have all periodic stuff outsourced nicely to my wonderful VA.

That question was easy to answer.  I feel like I just got off easy ;)

Now a question for you:

How much does your hubby know about your business?

Being a single, when I do get married someday, I really hope to have someone who understands what I do.  Blog Voyuer… How do you feel about that?

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Hey Lynn :)

by Kelly on October 12, 2007

Lynn Terry spotted the cross blog conversation that I have going on with my pal Nicole Dean and she wants in on the action so she’s asked us both a question.

Her question is:  I’m curious what you do when you’re not online blogging, emailing your lists, working on your websites - and managing your online business, in general. What’s your personal life like, behind the scenes? As in, how do you spend your free time and what are your favorite things to get into? 

What a great question to answer on a Friday evening!

Hey Lynn :)

What is my personal life like?

Well, I’m a single mom and I’m not dating anyone and haven’t dated anyone since my divorce when Sean was just two years old.   I’m a very comfortable single and do not long for a soul mate at this point in my life.  Someday though!

I used to spend a lot of my free time at church and on church related activities.  But since my move to Lansing I’ve been doing well to show up on Sunday mornings.  I miss the connection of my church family up in Gaylord, but I made this move because I wanted to be a bigger part of my family’s life and that is where my focus is now.

I have three brothers and one sister.  Two of them I’m not close to and probably never will be, but two of them I love to bits and missed terribly when I lived up north.  I’m so glad to be back in the neighborhood and am enjoying the time I get to spend with them.

My niece just gave birth to quadruplets, two boys, two girls.  They’re one month old now and will soon start coming home from the hospital.  My flexible status as a full time entrepreneur will give me a lot of freedom to help out during the first year.  (Can you just imagine FOUR!)

I see a lot of diaper changes and bottle feedings and baby rocking in my free time in the not too distant future.

Outside of family, I love to read, I love my DVR and really enjoy going to see a good movie.  I like to dine out (love Chinese & Italian) and need a regular fix for my resale shopping habit.

Next year, when Sean has graduated and my niece and her hubby need less help with their brood, I want to start to travel.  I dream about driving around the US and Canada to meet the moms I’ve come to know online. (You’d be one of them!)

Well, it’s just hit 6pm here and that’s my cue to get the heck out of the home office and figure out whether I’m in the mood for chinese takeout or something else.  The man child and I have a hot date with the DVR this evening.

It’s a pretty average life, not all that exciting. But it’s the one I enjoy and that’s what counts right?

Now… I do have a question for you Lynn :)

I totally agree that this should spread and more people should do it!  It’s fun to do, gives me a great blog post every week and let’s me learn new things about my gal pal Nicole.

Who would you like to engage in a long term cross blog conversation with?

Check Lynn’s blog out for an answer soon.  And check to see if Nicole replies to her question as well!

And what about you?  Who would YOU like to have a cross blog conversation with?

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